I feel disdain for my ex-partner. She is a user. She had been married before me and would marry after me. Both marriages ended in divorce. She had her child with the first, the second paid off the house that I brought with her. It's been 23 years. She never loved me (which I knew all along), she had guys who she saw on a somewhat regular basis. Within a week of my grand exit, new boyfriend had moved in. I had turned my life, at 40, upside down, moved 700 miles, for someone who never intended on anything with me. I was, in essence, the mortgage. Years later, I got an anonymous letter confirming what I already knew. I don't hate her, but she scarred me. She cost me friends, money, my credit (two bankruptcies) and almost my family. The last thing I told her to her face "I don't mind that you lied to me, but you lied to my mother." That is what sticks with me after all these years.